Thanksgiving Weekend 2010

No blogging all weekend - It's been a tough weekend.  First Thanksgiving without daddy, got use to hearing the "let's eat!!" after prayer. 

Thanksgiving 2010

Already chopping celery and onion.  Good thing I have the onion to hide the crying. 

Yesterday we took daddy some oranges.  Feel like the Budhists with the food and givings, but ever since I moved here I've had orange trees and every year he would eat them like candy.  Wanted to keep the cold and flu away, ...he was also convinced if he ate enough chili it would keep the cancer away too.  After we left, Samuel wanted to know what would happen if a homeless ate the oranges, "Well, if he eats them, he'll enjoy them for grandpa."

Well were going to have all the fixings for Thanksgiving, momma wanted it at their home this year, it's going to be tough, the first time without daddy in 50 years.  But, again, we'll be together as a family and that's what important.  Daddy always wanted us to be sure we stayed together as a family no matter what and that's what we're going to do, plus eat a lot of food. 

Gotta take our stretchy pants today!

Thanksgiving 2009

It's a good day, Daddy has had his cancerous kidney removed and made it through the surgery.  He's started the chemo but it's in the pill form - expensive medicine - the side effects are a mile long.  Right now his bones are hurting, he's tired, and starting to get blisters in his mouth.  But today we're all together and that's whats important, plus all the good food helps too.

My first fight

On California street we were the last block before the railroad tracks.  Railroad tracks we crossed every morning to cut across to get to Maple School faster or otherwise we had to go around through San Joaquin then B street to Maple.  The tracks were faster, especially when your being chased.  The last house on the block across from us before the tracks were a family of girls.  Tall, muscular, black girls who were very athletic and intimidating.  We would try to run as fast as we could to pass them.  If caught they would grab us and take our lunch money.  Scary.  Then after school we would run home.  We told momma and daddy; first they tried to talk to their parents, and of course they would talk to their daughters.  Well that lasted a couple of days.  Again momma talk to their mom, momma didn't want her girls fighting because girls don't fight.  Well after many days of crying and pleading daddy about had it.  This was the drill as we were told by daddy, "you run as fast as you can, grab some rocks and hit them, then they'll leave you alone."  Momma still persisted, "no fighting," but daddy insisted, "you want to be left alone this is what you need to do."  We wanted to be left alone.  It worked.  They cried, we stared dumbfounded, then we walked to school together.

Admit!

Well by now he has been admitted.  Rubber rings around his esophagus, seven pints of blood later he's feeling tired but alive.  We've made it over the first bump.  I'm back to school and work and trying to absorb what's happening or going to happen.  The doctor has found a tumor (the infamous bursitis) on his right shoulder and is worried because it broke the bone and is pretty big.  Now it's ultrasounds, MRI's, x-rays, and more blood for the blood tests.  The waiting is the worst.

Our first bikes

When I was about seven we all got bikes.  I think they were bikes made from different parts because they were multicolored, but we didn't care they were bikes.  Anyway that was the easy part, the hard part was learning to ride them.  Daddy had this trick, he would run along side us holding the back, and promised he would stay behind us.  Next thing you know, we turn around and he's standing behind with a big smile because we were riding it on our own.  Of course when we realized he wasn't there anymore our handlebars were swerving and we were swerving then, "crash" onto the pavement.  We did'nt get hurt much and he had us get back on the bike a few times, and in a couple days we were pros at it.  Forty years later I'm using the same trick on my son, only I did it on grass.

FYI - a few years later we all got nice new bikes - three weeks after they were stolen from some kids down the street.  Daddy went to the house and took them back.  We got them back, but of course we had to add parts and we were back to the multicolored bikes.

The Hospital Stay

Now they've admitted daddy in the hospital for more tests.  For months his arm had been hurting.  We kept telling him, "daddy you need to get that checked."  Two weeks before he went to the hospital they proceeded to tell him it was bursitis and gave him a cortisone shot to help with the pain.  I'm not sure if they x-rayed.  He said they did but it was in the hospital that we found out that he had a tumor that had grown so large around his ball joint/shoulder area on the right side that it literally broke the upper-arm bone in half.  A few days before the bleeding he was holding his arm with his left hand.  It hurt so bad but he took their word that it was bursitis and would clear up soon.  There was no reason for us to think otherwise.

Chevy 1966 Supersport

We had a white Chevy 1966 Supersport - I loved that car.  Daddy would drive and I would sit in the back behind him on my knees leaning on the seat.  We didn't have to use seatbelts then, but it usually was just around town, going from home to grandmas, or home to aunt Connies.  The interior was blue, not a dark blue but a light blue.  I don't think it was leather, probably synthetic plastic, but the seams were horizontal.  The four of us would fit in the back and the front was two seats with the console in the middle.  I would ask daddy, "when I grow up, can I have this car daddy?"  He would just smile and nod.  Later, daddy sold it and bought a 1975 burgundy red two-door Cordoba Chrysler - it was so sharp I forgot I wanted the Chevy.

After the drama

After things had settled down in the emergency room, we called his sisters and brothers.  It had been too soon after our uncle died in May 2009 so we were all nervous.  I had one sister visiting in San Jose and a brother living in San Bernarndino, Badoll and momma were already there.  Time to call in the troops.  I still didn't want to say to come 'cause to say come was to admit something was really wrong. 

Daddy had a hard time after his brother passed and when he got sick, he was convinced he would be next - this was what it was all about.  Even the doctor said to talk to him because he had a "fatalistic" view of the world right now.  Daddy called us in one at a time to tell us where things were just in case.  Including myself.  I was in the lobby doing what I normally do.  Visiting and thinking,  "it's all going to be o.k."  We'll be home in a couple of days and it will just be another day in our life.  Daddy will be back to his being our daddy.  I couldn't let him go yet and God wasn't going to take him from us.....yet.

1950s

Daniel, Steve Cuellar, Alfie, Daddy "Blinky", and Manuel "Mucket"

The first car club in Tulare, California was started by my dad and his buddies.  Of course he was the only one with the car, there was; Blinky, Bird, Mucket, Moose, and there was Clutch, and some others I don't remember now.  Maybe later.  They still meet every second Thursday of the month 55+ years later.  Daddy went the last time in May 2010.

FYI daddy is the one slouched over - the class clown...

The beginning of the end

July 16, 2009 I got the call that would change everything we were use to.  Momma called while me and my daughter were at the library, "your daddy's not doing good, you need to come quick!"  If daddy was sick it was not good at all - he never really got sick or if he did he wouldn't say - but for him to say so it wasn't good.  "Call 911, I'll be right there!"  We quickly turned around and went to the house,  when I walked in to the bedroom he was sitting on the edge of the bed rubbing his head.  The ambulance shows up, I was worried they would think we were just calling for something minor,  I had to tell them, if daddy sick he's really sick.  When we pulled the blankets back - there were globs of blood, we didn't know it then but he was literally bleeding out.  They rushed him to the ambulance and we rushed to our car to the hospital.  They flew down Fowler and we took the freeway.  He coded in the ambulance, in the emergency room and again when we got there.  We knew none of this yet.

California Street

We lived in this old two bedroom with a Dick and Jane Bathroom, service porch, LR and DR and a huge backyard.  In the front we had a big porch and down the steps a walnut tree we would climb and throw walnuts to the kids walking by.  I don't know if they knew where they were coming from, but it was fun.  Our next door neighbor was our aunt and uncle and six cousins.  On the other side was a old black couple with a son who had a drinking problem and would periodically be gone on binges.  She was the nicest lady.  We would walk home from school and she'd stop us to give us some homemade oatmeal cookies and cold milk.  Those were the days when it wasn't wrong to go into the neighbors and enjoy their time.  One summer, and they were hot 115 degree summers, we were asleep in our bed (me and my sister), my brother slept in the bed next to us, and the baby in the room with momma and daddy.  Anyway, me and Badoll were asleep with the window open.  During the night she started screaming that someone had reached in and touched her face, by the time daddy had ran into the room through the bathroom, whoever it was, was gone.  I was convinced she was making it up so I told her we could trade tonight, then I could prove she was making it up.  So it's  nighttime and of course she's screaming again.  He had literally reached through the window across my face and touched her again on the face.  When I open my eyes I saw a long skinny black arm across my face and this time daddy made it across the bathroom and grabbed his arm.  It was the neighbors son.  My dad spoke to them,  We never did see him again.  It was very sad for the mom and dad, but we were able to sleep through the night again.

First day blogging

I thought it would be cool to blog about my dad, he just passed and the old phrase, "it gets easier as time goes by,"  NOT.  He was known as "Blinky" because he refuse to wear his glasses and he would blink a lot!
I've never done this so I'll see how it goes from here. bye for now.